Coming Soon-Ish: Zombies, Inspirational Family/Sports Movies, and AMERICA FIGHTS BACK!

Red Dawn

The funny thing is, I’ve seen the original Red Dawn, but I remember absolutely nothing about it. I think my brain tried to block its existence, or something. I don’t know that this is going to be much better . . . I wasn’t exactly getting wow vibes from the trailer . . . but I am glad it’s finally coming out. I feel bad for movies that were made years ago and then were put on a shelf somewhere to wither and die.

Of course, in this instance, Red Dawn’s delayed release probably served it well. Three years ago, most people didn’t know who Chris Hemsworth and Josh Hutcherson were. Now, this movie’s starring Thor and Peeta, and you know that can only help the movie at the box office. (I say Peeta bites it, though. I don’t know why. I just do.)

Antiviral

Okay, this officially looks pretty fucking creepy.

This is the first film by Brandon Cronenberg, David Cronenberg’s son, and at first the trailer looks an awful lot like a Resident Evil trailer. (No, there aren’t zombies. It’s that fake ad look that all the RE movies sport.) But this film’s clearly going to far weirder places. The basic story seems to be that, in the future, people are so obsessed with celebrities that they go to the Lucas Clinic to contract the same disease as their celebrity of choice, which . . . ew. But if this isn’t a surrealistic, headtrippy nightmare by the end, I’d be surprised.

Surrealistic, headtrippy nightmares aren’t usually my kind of movies, but I have some interest. Anything that makes me recoil a little on the couch and cover my mouth earns a bit of attention.

Playing for Keeps

I can’t remember the last time I was interested in a Gerard Butler movie. Maybe . . . 300? I don’t know. Anyway, this movie? Yeah, I’m not interested in this one, either. Which is too bad because I haven’t seen Catherine Zeta-Jones in ages, and I actually want to be interested in her movies. Still. Divorced dad learns to be a better parent and tries to make up with mom who’s just about to get married. Also soccer. Yawn.

Trouble With the Curve

This movie is directed by Clint Eastwood. It’s got a good cast. And a few lines made me laugh, namely . . .

“Who are you, Dr. Phil?”
“Hey, that is quality television.”

and

“Get out of here before I have a heart attack trying to kill you.”

But that being said, this movie looks almost as boring as the Gerard Butler one. Clearly, my bias against inspirational family dramas that center around sports is showing, but I feel like I’ve seen a dozen different versions of this story, and despite Eastwood and the talent of this cast, I don’t know that I’m going to get anything new from this one. Pass . . . until a family member inevitably makes me watch it, that is.

Liberal Arts

Now, see this is that indie romantic-dramady how-do-I-deal-with-being-an-adult-post college thing that I absolutely would watch, probably because I’m actually dealing with the adult-post-college part myself. “I was English with a minor in History, just to make sure I was fully unemployable.” Heh. This English major with an emphasis in Creative Writing and a minor in Philosophy and Religion can relate.

While I relate less to the romantic stuff, I’m excited by the idea that there doesn’t seem to be a lot of ridiculous made-up melodrama here. You know, it seems like the age difference between these two characters is actually talked about intelligently. That’s interesting.

Also a supporting cast of Richard Jenkins and Allison Janney? Sold. I mean, I don’t know if it’s a theater movie for me, but I’d definitely rent this.

And finally . . . Cockneys vs Zombies

Heh. I’ve seen funnier looking zombie films before, but this one made me smile enough. Although it could probably just as easily have been called Old People vs Zombies. Or Brick Top vs Zombies. Anyway, I’ll probably see it at some point.

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2 Responses to Coming Soon-Ish: Zombies, Inspirational Family/Sports Movies, and AMERICA FIGHTS BACK!

  1. I think more of you for being underwhelmed by regurgitated family dramas that use sports as a cheap mechanism for generating pseudo-suspense.

    • Honestly, I just think they’re boring. But you go ahead and make my boredom sound more like an intellectual protest 🙂

      By the way, carliefantard made me bust out laughing. Thank you for that.

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