Here’s a very silly thing.

Months ago, there was this writer meme on Twitter: imagine if Hollywood decided to make adaptations out of all your stories. The catch? You can only pick one singer or band to provide the soundtracks for each film or show. Which do you choose?

I thought Massive Attack. I thought Arcade Fire. I thought Nine Inch Nails, The Naked and Famous, The Rolling Stones. But in the end, there was only one possible choice for me, a band whose music I’ve adored for over a decade, a band who I’d happily watch score westerns or horror movies or sci-fi apocalypses: Radiohead.

And then, being ridiculous, I spent the next few months actually trying to pick one Radiohead song per published story. Which song just somehow fit what I had written? Which song could I hear while making a fanvid in my head?

Luckily for you all, I have no idea how to make a halfway decent fanvid of anything, much less my own prose. But since I can make silly lists, I present . . .

A Not-Quite-Wine Pairing: Carlie St. George and RADIOHEAD

A few things to keep in mind:

A. I can’t really justify any of my song choices. “No Surprises,” for instance, wouldn’t even make my Top 20 and certainly feels like an odd choice for a feminist meta horror story set in slasher Purgatory, and yet when my brain conjured up a bunch of slow-mo murder and dead girl after dead girl crawling out of the ground . . . somehow, it just fit.

B. Much to my frustration, finding the album versions of many Radiohead songs on Youtube is downright impossible. I wanna see them in concert, I really do, but damn it, I was not looking for the live versions of any of these songs. A few of these especially drive me mad; I specifically chose songs that were eerie and haunting and somehow ended up with acoustic. It’s . . . not quite the same.

C. Considering The Spindle City Mysteries are comprised of three interconnecting novelettes (“The Case of the Little Bloody Slipper,” “The Price You Pay is Red,” and “The Long and Silent Ever After”), I decided to only use one song for all three.

D. I am legitimately shocked that I have not yet written a story that I liked paired with “Karma Police” or “2+2=5 (The Lukewarm),” and clearly, I need to fix that immediately.

And now, to the music!

“This Lexicon of Bone and Feathers” – Sword & Sonnet – September 2018

It is apparently inappropriate to ask an Earthling child for their teeth, even if they have more than enough to spare and the ability to grow replacements.

“Three May Keep A Secret” – Strange Horizons – November 2017

Scarlett accidentally wakes the dead in the bottom of a coat closet, with a half-naked boy pressed against her and a bottle of tequila she’s too drunk to drink.

“Astronauts Can’t Touch You” – Daily Science Fiction – September 2017

Everyone outside this room is an astronaut, and you’re never surprised when astronauts die.

“If We Survive the Night” – The Dark – March 2017

It’s autumn, and all the dead girls are kneeling in the yard.

“Every Day is the Full Moon” – Lightspeed – December 2016

Your father is a werewolf, but mostly he’s just an asshole.

“The Elixir of the Not-So-Disgusting Death Smell” – Mothership Zeta – January 2016

My boyfriend Brandon had been dead two days. He smelled like he’d been embalmed in lavender.

“The Spindle City Mysteries” – The Book Smugglers – November and December 2015

It was half past eleven when I saw her. She was standing at the top of the staircase, with restless fingers and defiant eyes, wrapped in blue silk that clung to her hips. Her legs went on, and on, and on.

“Break the Face in the Jar by the Door” – The Unlikely Journal of Coulrophobia – April 2015

Ask yourself: what would your face say, if you let it?

“Caretaker” – Shimmer – November 2014

The stars are all dead.

“Such Lovely Teeth, Such Big Teeth” – Strange Horizons – March 2014

The wolf moves like a man, talks like a man, picks up the paper in his boxers and drinks coffee like a man. But Reagan isn’t fooled.

“We Share the Dark” – Shock Totem – January 2014

When the ghost sat beside me, I was sitting on the porch, considering suicide the same idle way people think about where they’d go on vacation, if they could afford to.

“This Villain You Must Create” – Lightspeed – July 2013

Granite killed Mr. Malevolence on a Tuesday. In his defense, Mr. Malevolence had been trying to destroy the entire world at the time.

Because I’m ridiculous, I will almost certainly continue to update these Radiohead pairings on my Works Published tab, assuming I ever . .  sob . . . sell anything again. Wish me luck!