The Poll of DOOM!

[NOTE: This Monday Morning Blasphemous Poll is neither blasphemous nor being posted on a Monday. Because on this blog, I . . . am . . . GOD!]

[Additional Note: The previous note’s statement about the nature of my divinity would carry a lot more weight if this entire poll wasn’t about punishing me for my made-up sins and silly failures.]

Well, I set myself a few challenges this year, and while I completed some of them, I failed — miserably — at others. For various reasons, I came nowhere near watching and reviewing all the 24 horror movies I assigned myself . . . and so I must pay penance.

The nature of that penance, to an extent, is up to you.

I have a list of eight films. These films are widely considered to be some of the worst movies ever made. I have never seen any of them because even my love for shitty movies only goes so far . . . until now.

Sometime before March 2013, I will watch and review one of these movies. The question is: which one do you want to read a review/total snarkfest of?

This poll will be open one week and one day. I will likely post the results December 27th.

[Final Note: Please be merciful. For the love of God, HAVE MERCY!]

“Mind Your Business! I Shall Be Eaten by Whomever I Please!”

So I made this horror movie challenge for myself at the beginning of the year, and I can already tell you that I’m going to fail it. Abysmally. We’ll talk about punishment come December, but for now, let’s get to reviewing one of the movies actually on the list.

. . . also known as Cemetery Man.

Honestly? I don’t know what the hell to make of this thing.

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“Don’t Let Them Bury Me!”

I plan to watch a lot of horror movies this weekend. Unfortunately—or fortunately, depending on your point of view—I don’t expect any of them to be very good because I specifically rented the ones that I thought had the highest potential of mockability. (For example, one of said movies is a Uwe Boll film.) So I figured, I should at least watch one horror movie this week that’s actually on my serious To-See list. The movie?

There are some fairly creepsome moments in this film.

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